Database optimization techniques you can actually use

I just saw an article on Smashing Magazine titled “Speeding up your website’s database“. I love Smashing’s contribution to the webdev community, but their articles are getting longer and more basic at the same time.

I understand the need for simplicity because of the wide audience of Smashing Magazine, but I’d wish they’d give something more than the absolute basics you could find in almost any other site out there. I also didn’t like some of the methods mentioned there for profiling (or the code itself), so I here is my starter guide to optimizing database performance.
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